Alright, Alright

Okay so things lately have been going smoothly for the most part. Still struggling in some areas and I am also realizing more and more the things that God really wants from me. They are simple things but for some reason I am making them difficult. 

I am not much more easy going about the things that are going on around me. Including baseball, school work, and any other area that is going on in my life. I am catching my tongue and trying my best to put God first no matter what the situation may be.

Through all of this I have failed at a few things that have just kind of been bothering me. I have found a solutions to these so it wont happen again. I had to delete their number out of my phone which I usually have trouble doing but after I did I felt relieved. Like I said before, solutions to problems can be so easy but it is up to defeat our stubborn attitudes and just go for it. For example the other day I lost my wallet. Now I lost it in my car but for some reason no matter how many times I went through my car searching for it, it never popped up. I retraced my footsteps time and time again but the one place where I set my wallet seemed to be a blur. I talked to God throughout this search and tried my best to keep peace about it and know that somehow it was going to pop up. After a few hours I wanted real bad to get frustrated and at times I did but then something happened. I was about to give up so I went, parked my car, and something was telling me to retrace my footsteps one more time. Of course my stubborn attitude I didn't want to even though it was real easy. So after thinking about it I did it one more time. Sure enough nothing was a blur anymore and I reached over and it was right on the side of the passenger seat. Right out in the open! I laughed and realized how much of a big deal I made out of nothing. I feel that God just wanted me to take the time to talk to him and trust in him. Sometimes the smallest situations can have the largest impact. God definitely works in unusual ways but they always work perfectly. 


Anyways, it has been a good week and I am glad that I am able to jot a few things down from time to time. I hope and pray that more writing will be coming soon.


Dear God,
Thank you for making me realize that talking and trusting in you is very important in order to go through everyday life. I pray that I can find peace in everything I do and I praise you through each task of the day. I pray that I can stay away from any type of action that displeases you Father. I pray that I can find time to write more and spend more time with you. I pray that I can mantain a positive attitude. I love you so much.
AMEN

Relax! It's just a game!

Well I got super busy the last couple days and haven't had the opportunity for an update. Things are still going smoothly for the most part. I am still struggling in some areas but I have people helping and praying for me every step of the way.


 www.eatball.com

One thing that has really gone through my mind lately is my attitude. I tend to act differently depending on the situation I am involved in or who I may be hanging out with. I especially notice that I am a totally different person when I am playing baseball. I am what you call an emotional player, I am literally affected by every play that goes on during the game or even practice. This week we had a few games where I really let my emotions get the best of me and I was unable to perform the way I normally should. It is somewhat embarrassing to look back on the ridiculous things I think and say during a game but it is best to go back and laugh at what I actually did. The thing is that baseball is the one sport where it is acceptable to fail a certain amount of times and still be declared great. The problem is that I don't deal to well with failure which gets me into more trouble. Failure is not only embarrassing to me but it is also fills my mind with anger. I know I know, it seems like I am this crazy guy but sometimes I can be. I try my best to get my mind off things and laugh it off with teammates but for some reason I can't shake off certain at bats or plays on the field and they tear me up inside. So I have realized that this too is something I need to work on and just relax because it is just a game. There is no need to be the superstar or the well known athlete. I would rather be known as a superior follower of Jesus then a superior baseball player and getting upset during a game or after an at bat wont help either of those situations. It will only hurt it. So in the end I have learned a lot through this week of conviction and I can definitely see some improvement coming my way! We got a day off today from baseball and I was really able to clear my mind away from all the negative areas and just work to get better!

Ecclesiastes 10:4 (New International Version)

 ⁴ If a ruler's anger rises against you,
       do not leave your post;
       calmness can lay great errors to rest.



Dear God,
Please help me to be able to have a positive attitude and use the talent you gave me to glorify you. Help me to be able to control my anger and tongue during games and practice Lord. Help me to be able to trust my talent and work hard to get better. Give me the energy I need to be able to get through the day and for me to find time to work out on a daily basis. Help me to continue to write and enjoy what I do Lord. I love you very much.
AMEN

Still Climbing

Ever since the other night for some reason I wake up much better even though I only average about 7 and a half hours a night. I just go about the day with a much brighter sense and positive attitude. I look at things brighter and try to remain happy and joyful when around others. One thing I have to continue to do is fight off the enemy and really spend some time talking with God. This sometime can be a tough thing to do especially since I am so caught up on pointless earthly pleasures. I am going to continue this climb up the hill and not give up along the way. 


One thing that I definitely to start doing consistently is reading more of scripture. Going to class is one thing but actually taking time out of my own day to read the word of God is real important. It doesn't really matter what I read, it always seems to apply to my life one way or another. One thing that I recently became interested in was the gospels. Reading about the life of Jesus for some reason just fascinates me. I am sure it is normal for believers but just learning about how the way he went about things and the certain ways he debt with temptations, Jesus is not only my savior he is my hero. My goal in life is to live my life just as he lived his. There is no way I can be perfect but there are millions of ways that I can please him. 


Another positive note is that God keeps showing me signs in different ways telling me not to give up and stay strong! I am so thankful that I am able to take the time to write! I haven't been able to really do this in well over a month and I can't remember the last time I posted things three days in a row! Praise God


Well I leave here tonight with a prayer and a bible verse!

“A man finds joy in giving an apt reply— and how good is a timely word!”- Proverbs 15:23

Dear God,
Thank you for another good day. Although there were times I did struggle I thank you for letting me realize each area where I need to improve my walk with you. I pray that I can be able to get in your word more and spend more time with you. Please continue to help me walk not run this climb by your side God. Help me to have a positive attitude and be an example to others. Help me to live by your standards not mine and help me to focus on Godly things not on earthly things. I pray for my friends and family that may be struggling in specific areas of their life. Help them to look to you for answers whether they know you or not. I love you very much.
AMEN 

Step Forward

Well after a rough couple weeks I went through today with a totally different approach to how I handled things. I was definitely a little shaky but over felt some what accomplished after listing the things that I have been struggling with lately. My game really didn't go as well I as I have hoped and I got angry at points but I kept trying to stay in control with God and he helped me through the rough patches through the day. I also had to fight off the enemy a few times especially when I went to college group tonight. The thoughts that just get caught up in m head, I don't even know where they come from.

Anyways, I see change in my life and I am starting to notice every little thing I do that is unnecessary and the things that I say I sometimes should just keep to myself. I have learned that I am a pretty emotional guy and I like to express how I feel whether it may be positive or negative.

I definitely have a long way to go and it is going to be a tough process but I am going to use all the strength I have in order to make it through this rough patch and come out on top. Since I have God on my side I am guaranteed to come out on top %100 of the time.

Having 3 days off of school starting tomorrow is definitely a plus and will relieve a lot for stress, hopefully I'll be able to get caught up on homework and hit up the gym.

Dear God,
Thank you for the progress today. Please help me to continue to seek you and follow your ways as I go through my everyday walk Lord. Help me to think positively and get rid of all negativeness. Help me to admit when I am wrong and help me to be able to listen to others as they let me know when I do something wrong Lord. Keep me away form any kind of sexual temptation and lustful thoughts. Help me to be able to pay attention through Church and class sessions Lord. Keep me safe through the day and help me to have a Christ like attitude. I love you.
Amen

Oh yea and...

www.BibleGateway.com must of knew what I was going through and picked the daily verse just for me.

Psalm 51:12 (New International Version)

¹² Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

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Facing My Faults

I know it has been way too long since the last time I have taken the time to write things down here. Honestly since the last time I wrote consistently it seems as if I have lost my fire for the Lord. I see myself getting lazy not only through my everyday life agenda but lazy in seeking and honoring God. I seem to be getting caught up in little pointless things that keep me from the things that need to get done. The only real time that I have picked up the Bible lately was for class and that is the one thing professors told us not to do. I am literally spending no time with God and prayer. I feel down and broken many times during the day. My grades are slipping, I don't have the energy to work out, and I am slowly getting over playing baseball. Sound ridiculous? Well it is. For some reason I thought that I would be able to handle a full schedule this semester. So far it hasn't worked out for me. Not only do I have practice every day except Sunday but I also have class Monday through Friday then work on Saturdays and Sundays. Leaving me basically no time to do anything really and by the time I am done with practice all I want to do is eat and be lazy. I see other people studying for test, working out, telling me what God is doing in their lives, and then I can't even think about the last time I studied for a test, the last time I worked out, or the last time I had a real encounter with my Jesus. I get caught up in making friends, girls, and pointless things on the computer. I try to distance my self from certain things but for some reason they keep popping up. I try to pray real hard but for some reason I just can't figure out what the real problem is. Basically I just want to give up even though that isn't an option. I need to be able to man up and face my faults and open up to others about what is going on in my life. I know that there are people in my life that are willing to listen but I don't know if I know them well enough to open up to help me through this slump. Things I am struggling in include: lustful thoughts, anger, hate, stress, time management, prayer, frustration, love, judging, stealing, laziness, money management, not going to church Sunday morning, selfish thoughts and actions, inappropriate jokes and thoughts, watching R films, looking more then once on bad things that my eyes stumble upon, and many more that I can't even think of. Now I am not running around doing all of these things at once. Honestly I am praying for each and everyone of these things and I can feel the conviction everyday. Every time I commit one of these faults I often have to fight off the enemy and try my best not to slip up and regret something that I do later. This does lead to frustration and lame thoughts that posses me throughout the day. God awakened me today while sitting in my favorite class of the semester New Testament History and Literature with Dr. Mickey Klink. I have never met a man that truly loves scripture like he does. The way he talks about it makes me feel like a child again upon how excited he gets when talking about certain verses and chapters throughout the new testament. Today he talked about letting others know about your faults and for some reason it hit me like a ton of bricks. I new right away that I needed to get things off of my chest and I didn't know how to do it, so after I got up in bed I decided that I was going to read the Bible but when I got up in here for some reason I felt the need to write and talk about what is going on in my life. So I dusted off the good ol blog and decided to pump some stuff out. It feels real good to be able to flow freely on the keyboard without having to really think about what to write about. It is also nice to type something that isn't notes or an essay. It makes me realize how much I miss taking the time to write everyday about my life and my experiences with God. I pray that I will be able to do this more especially since I go to bed late every night now. I definitely have the time to put something up hear everyday but for some reason I just don't. So today I am going to do something that I have never done and just list some stuff asking if you can pray for me. Although no one may really go on here anymore, I need all the prayer I can get. I could probably go on and on with the things that are really going on inside my head lately but I just wanted to get the point across...it is 1AM so i don't know if the whole thought process really worked but I am glad that I actually took the time to get this stuff off my chest.

Although reading this may seem like I am being selfish, it is because I am just trying to get a lot of stuff off of my chest that I have built up inside of me. Everything I think of I write it down no matter how big or small of a circumstance it may be. Once I am able to cope all these things together and figure them out I will be able to help others who may be struggling just like I am today.
Please pray for God to help me for:
Being able to use my time wisely
Help me to keep from committing any type of sin
Keep me away from sexual lust
Keep me away from the love of money
Help me manage my money better
Help me not to judge others
Help me to not be lazy
Help me to not get caught up in pointless necessaries
Help me to seek God and have a burning desire to desire him
Help me to find time to sleep and to wake up refreshed
Help me to love others as Jesus loved me
Help me to be able to represent Jesus everywhere I go
Keep me from looking at things I shouldn't
Keep me humble
Help me to be able to read the Bible and understand Jesus more
Help me not to get frustrated
Help me to be able to do my homework
Help me to take things seriously
Help me to get closer to the guys on my team
Help me to be able to set the good example
Help me not to boast
Help me to be fair
Keep me from steeling anything whatsoever
Pray that I am able to find someone close to me that I can talk to about anything and have them understand what the heck is going on in my unusual brain.

Dear God,
Thank you for pushing me into writing the things I did here today. Help me to be able to find the time to do this on a daily basis. Help me to get closer to you and not do this for myself but to do it all for you! I pray that I can be able to spend time with my family more often and be able to go to church on Sunday mornings. Help me to work harder in both school, baseball, and most of all reading the Bible. Give me a good night sleep so that I may be refreshed for the oncoming day. Help me to do anything I can to serve you God. Help me to keep my eyes and thoughts away form anything sexual God. Help me not to judge others but to love them. Please guide me on the right path to righteousness. Help me to kick off this the moment I wake up to the moment I fall asleep. Give me the strength I need to be able to keep you in my thoughts throughout the day.
I love You.
Amen